


Chains Gave Me Wings

by Army Neverland (LokiInMagnussenKilledBySherlockAndTony)



Category: Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Accidents, Dark, Drugs, F/M, M/M, Pain, Rape, Violence, more to be added later - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-03
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-04-29 19:43:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5140187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LokiInMagnussenKilledBySherlockAndTony/pseuds/Army%20Neverland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A woman getting back in her dark memories and telling you her story, from the beginning... Well, from fragments of memory.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Childhood Stories (Human leather shoes for crocodile dandees - Caravan Palace)

**Author's Note:**

> So, this story is VERY dark. If you don't like that kind of writing, I won't force you to read this. But if you don't mind, please, enjoy this silliness I wrote.   
> This first chapter is a First Person POV. I may write others, but I'll take time to write them. I don't really want long chapters, only well written ones. I hated faded ones I wrote before.  
> I am French, so my English writing is a little hesitant. Feel free to tell me all the mistakes I've done... And I already feel bad for those.   
> HAVE A NICE READING TIME !

I was born in a small, dark hospital. All I remember of being a baby is darkness. I wasn't joyful nor sad nor angry, I was numb. Numb and cold. Then the next thing I remember is a closet. A dark closet with two toys. Cold, dark… I've loved darkness and cold. Because when light and warmth came, there was always something wrong with this. Shouts, cries… It even hurt sometimes. The third young childhood's memory I have is the woman who lived with me and tried to raise me, crying in the dark, my baby brother in her arms… And me hugging her leg before going into darkness after the Man came in. Then I don't have any memories of Mother. Only my brother, me, and the Man who ruled the place.

The first big memory I have is elementary school. The first time I step in there. I've felt so free… Free of that Man, able to hide in the darkest corners of the big place so I could breathe and feel safe… Even the men and women here were very nice and careful. But I've forgotten the night. Maybe something bad happened… For a couple of years I've always felt scared of the Man and didn't really wanted to go to school… Maybe because my baby brother was still there, and that I always found him hungry and hiding in the dark, under the bed, where He couldn't reach him. I always helped him out there and he always slept with me. I don't think I've ever done that again in that level of care. Maybe because of the nightmares that followed…

Once my brother had the age to go to school, I became very good at classes. In a year, I was top of the class. The second year, teachers were talking about skipping a class because I had the level to go higher. The Man didn't bother anything about school, as long as when I would turn 16, I would work to get money at home. He drank a lot. He even begun to take drugs. But alcohol was his favorite. Always. And we both knew that when he was drinking, we had to hide and try to not make a single noise, or He would come seek us and beat us. The first time it happened, I protected my brother… And He used his old leather belt he always used on Her. I bled for at least half an hour. But I went to sleep, still protecting my brother.

At some point, at 10 years old I ended with people two years older than me… And at twelve, three years older. I was always rejected by everyone, I was the Weirdo. I never talked to anyone except adults. And even not all of them. I always ended in some Library to read books and keep feeding myself from Culture and History. My brother was growing up too but loved school too much to leave it as quickly as I would. He was intelligent, he even made some friends… He was happy out there. And I was as happy as he was when we were outside. But when the day ended, the nightmare began. Every night was the same. He would come home, having used almost all his money into alcohol and drugs… And shouting at us, hitting us… Well mostly me since I always protected my brother. But my twelve's year of life was frightening for me… Because that was when He begun to use me. He wanted to use both of us, but in the ended I always convinced him to always use me. Since I was beginning to become a woman, he began to 'show me how a woman had to be with a man'… So I had been forced to pleasure him in any ways possible and unimaginable… My brother always picked up the pieces of me left by Him. And when the day came, I went to school. Then, less than two months later, he decided that pleasuring him was not enough. I looked much older than my real age. So he forced me to work to get money home. One of his acquaintances accepted me in his bar. And a became a sexy barmaid… Every day after school, until almost midnight… And he always paid me hand to hand with money every night. His acquaintance found I was a good worker after another couple of months juggling with school, work and His pleasures. So I had a tip I kept for me and my brother to eat… And my tip became bigger, so, I still don't know if it was to forget or remember these days, but I began to buy drugs.

I felt I needed this to keep walking forward. I've learned much later that we never fell down in drugs without any reason. There was always a trigger. And following the weight of the trigger… Well, the drugs were harder or not. I began with simple joint. It was making me dizzy at first. Then I stopped feeling anything, so I found cocaine. And I loved it. It was such a powerful drug… I always felt like I could do anything, like I could beat them all and protect my little brother… But every time, when I came back home, the effects stopped, and He used me again, me who was becoming a doll without feelings anymore… I didn't know if I was looking for freedom and life anymore… Drugs were here to help me to stand it… And I as standing it.

But, of course, one day something else happened. I was in the library, reading some books about Metanoia. And I saw a boy. Not so young. He had blond curly hair, was quite thin and tall… And he was sleeping over a book about physics. He hadn't written a lot on his little book. I stood up and sat next to him, then I read about his exercise. And I began to do it. It took me at least one hour and a half, but when I ended, the Library was about to close… And I stood up, putting my sweat on me… When the young man woke up and looked at me. I put my hood on my head, taking my bag and putting back the chair at its place. He had blue eyes. Even if it could appear a little grayish or greenish, they were blue. I think I would never dare to wear Blue or like that color because of those eyes, that look that would follow me all my life… I was about to leave without a word when he saw the work I did and was surprised. He smiled to me and thanked me. He didn't have the time to add something. I literally ran away because I was late at work and didn't want to say a single word about this to This man. His eyes scared me. He had the same eyes' colors as Him.

Let's say that when November began, I had been moved in another class. They were mostly doing theater and arts. My reputation had preceded me so, when I came in the class, I was pleased to see their looks towards me. At least I wasn't verbally and physically bullied in the classes. I always ended in the Library before Work. And when Work ended, Hell began again. And then my little brother told me his day while I was high. He was always worried about me, but at some point, I was used to it. I saw the young man a couple of times but he never saw me… I never let him saw me. I never wanted to. I was too afraid of him.

Then December came. And the exams too. I was prepared as always… But I didn't want the exams to come so quickly, because it meant I had to stay at home longer than before. The only thing I wasn't prepared at was the arrival of a new classmate… The teacher introduced him as Thomas… Thomas Hiddleston. And when I looked up, I saw THOSE eyes. This was the young man I helped in the Library. I was scared, much more scared than before because it was somewhere I wasn't used to be relaxing. I hated him. And when the teacher showed the free seat next to me, I hated him more than anything. I wanted to disappear, to hide under the desk I had, or to hit him so anyone would leave me alone. But I didn't do anything. He sat next to me, smiling with his greatest and most charming one, taking out his own pen. The teacher told him to do his best in this exam. When the time of writing came, I locked myself away from this moment. Of course, the class was so full he would have to seat next to me EVERY time. I answered all the questions as quickly as I could and as precise as I could too, leaving the class with a flabbergasted teacher and a half shy half sad neighbor. I left the class' corridor and when to the Library. I had two whole hours to work on the next exam. I knew everything by heart, but a two hours' work wasn't worthless. I wrote down everything I could in the first thirty minutes. I was quick, that was why I was so young and yet in that high class. I learned quickly, I wrote quickly, I read quickly and understood everything. After writing down, I looked further in my mind about other things I could have missed… And in the end, I opened a book and read it all. It was a book I saw the time before and that I really wanted to read. About Shakespeare. The teacher had advised to read it. I hated thy teacher but I really loved Shakespeare. Only one of his plays could made me have work for hours. I loved working. It made me forget everything else.

But, this time in the Library could have past without incident if that stupid new student hadn't come here. He had seen me and walked in my direction. He smiled with a shy one and was about to talk when I got up and left without a word, coldly, wanting to hit him hard, and put my book back on its shelf, leaving the Library. He follow me with one sheet of paper, not at ease at all, knowing perfectly that I would back off again and again. I hated those people. He almost ran to me but I walked faster to keep the distance. I only wanted to be left alone and never have a reminder of Him next to me. School was the only place I was good at. At some point he put his hand on my left shoulder. The pain which was already here made me wince and I turned to hit him hard before running in the Girls' toilets. He was left here, stunned, and two boys from my class went to talk to him. I knew what they were saying, but I didn't care. I locked myself in some toilets, took out cocaine, some paper rolled… And I sniffed. It was quite a big one for the first one of the day. I knew it. But I didn't care. I had His eyes next to me at school now.

When I went in the corridor, after checking myself, I stood at a safe distance from all of them. The new boy was talking with the others, but I knew, I always felt he was keeping an eye on me, looking at me. I hated that look. They had the same. When the teacher made us get inside the class, I went in the highest place possible. In this room there was place. And there were some absents. The new one looked at me frankly, sadness painting his face, and sat next to one of the stupids. The teacher gave us the exam, and, as before, I wrote down as quickly as I could and as precise as I could all the answers. The fact was that, this time, I wasn't alone to put my copy on the teacher's desk. He was here too. I nodded goodbye to the teacher and left but he quickly closed the gap between us when we ended in the park. He asked me why I was running away from him, and I asked him why he was always trying to talk to me when I was the most excluded person here, when I wasn't popular and sociable. I said that with disdain. And he smiled at me. His answer would always stay in my mind. I knew it took me some time to accept someone with the same eyes as Him being nice to me… But I knew that day that he would become my first friend. He answered me that he didn't like stupid. They were lowering the I.Q of the whole university like that. And the first smile in forever began to draw on my lips. We went to the exam without talking anymore. I knew he was different, I knew he was nice… But I always stood away from people like him. I didn't know what could happen with him. I didn't want him to be like Him. And yet I didn't really care. I only wanted to end in the Library alone and forgotten from everyone. This night, both work and Him were harder than before. And I took more cocaine, once again.

It went like that for a couple of months. Thomas was always sitting next to me in classes during exams, and he came with me at the Library to read everything I wrote while I was reading some books. He was intelligent and very interested at literature. It was… Almost refreshing to talk with someone who was quite mature for once. Everyone was talking about going in their families during holidays, or even going away… We were the only ones who could read Shakespeare for hours, never talking about our families, and having fun with each other. But the holidays' date came quicker than I wanted it to. My cocaine uptake was getting bigger and bigger. I needed something that could calm me instead of making me hyperactive. I decided to begin heroin. And everyone left.

I can't remember much of those holidays except the bliss of heroin and everything that came after that. It was, and will always be, one of my favorite drugs. Heroin made me feel safer… And happier. I never knew how to describe it for me at that time, but I experienced my first orgasms when I used it. And it never faded. Not even years later. When school came back, it was the same routine. And heroin was my escape. Thomas was getting friends, so we never hanged out like before the holidays. And I thought at that time that he never cared about me. I was wrong. But I never opened my eyes like now. I never tried to push my limits to understand that.

Thomas had never been very rich. His family was quite difficult to live in because of his father who left and his relations with his children. But Thomas could have some money by working on holidays. And those holidays he had left to work a little. And that night was his birthday's. I didn't talked to him since weeks ago. He was born in February. The 9th. It was a very cold year. Everything was still covered in snow. But he wanted to have fun and party. And he went to the Queen Ann's Unite. The Queen Ann's was a strip-tease bar… And he was here with two or three friends. He was enjoying himself.

The only thing I didn't mention was the fact that the Queen Ann's was the bar I worked in since months. And that was my first night as a strip-teaser. The girls were waiting for me to show off my skills. They knew what would happen if I didn't do what he wanted me to do. And I didn't know how to react. I hated all those drunk men who were hoping for me to take off all my clothes and give Them pleasure. I was dressed to give visual pleasure to them. And I was helping the girls to give drinks to everyone before the time of my show. I was tense. I didn't know how everyone would react, if I would be harassed or not… And the time came.

I climbed on the stage and did my little dance. I had to keep my underwear on for the first time, but next night, my bra will have to go. I danced around the pole, climbing on the pole, not looking at anyone at all… And taking off my clothes under the hungry eyes of drunk men. When my show ended, I disappeared in the backstage to dress up and breathe. I hated all that. I wanted all of then to die that night… And the worst was the fact that someone wanted me to do a private strip tease for his birthday. He had paid more than he should have for the whole night. I knew my night was ending now… And that I would hate the next days.

I changed in the room I had and left from the back door. They had told me he would wait here. It was dark. Very dark. And I wanted to run away. I didn't hear him coming. I only felt his hands putting his coat around my naked shoulders and his scarf gently around my throat. I was almost surprised by his care. I turned around and saw him. Thomas. I slapped him hard at first. And he laughed. He had been surprised by my reaction but it amused him. He offered his arm. I hesitated but took it, feeling a little safer. I asked him what he wanted. He told me he wanted me safe for tonight. He wanted to lead me to his house and know me safe sleeping in a warm bed. I refused. I told him I had been paid to do a strip-tease, not for sleeping. I had to go back home. He asked me why I kept doing this. He had seen the bruises. He had seen how I had been treated. He didn't want me to live another night like that. I stopped walking and almost hit him. I told him my little brother was home, that I didn't want him to live what I lived. And Thomas sighed. He nodded, understanding me, and called a cab, making me climb inside and telling his address name. He looked at me and asked me if I would accept to have at least a drink at his home. I accepted, knowing I wouldn't stay long. When the cab stopped, we were in a nicer part of London. I looked around me. Night made this place nicer. He smiled at me and lead me inside the house. It wasn't very big, but enough for three or four persons. He offered me a glass of orange juice, pouring himself one, and we talked a little. He told me he was living with his mother. He had two sisters, one doing news studies, the other in secondary school. His father left them a couple of years ago and he hated him. I didn't told him much except that my mother died and my little brother was the only precious human being I had. We laughed a little about classmates and other things… Then I asked him if he didn't want to be with his friends and he answered me I was a close friend for him. I almost laughed, but I choked. I was one of his closest friends… Who would he call a single 'friend' then ? A man who told him 'hello' in the streets ? When he tried to learn more about me, I stood up and took my school bag. He offered to bring me back home but I refused, having enough problems, and I left by foot. He tried to make me change my mind until I ran away, leaving him far behind me. When I got back home, I found my brother on the floor, blood on his lips… And He came behind me. Then everything was darkness.

The next day I remembered, I think a couple of weeks went on. I don't have details from all my days, but I still have some. And those periods, I've discovered lately, are darker periods, where He and drugs were mixed every day, almost every hour. That may be why I never remembered my old days' holidays and week ends. Anyway, the next day I remembered was a Tuesday. It was snowing a lot outside. I loved cold and snow. I was cold, but it was nice. I was feeling numb. I was sitting in the middle of the white, crisp and yet so sweet snow. It was a bliss, so nice… I wanted to close my eyes and stop there, on the nicest of moments… And I felt heat. I hated heat… But the scent was familiar… Almost nice. I felt comfortable in that heat. Then I heard a young baritone voice. It was telling me to open my eyes, to stay with him. I forced my eyes open and saw a coat… And red on the white snow. I was bleeding. I was shaking… And my vision blurred. That was when I put a name on that familiar voice… He was here to protect me, to protect us… To save us… He lifted me up and put me in a car. I heard a younger voice… Brother. My little brother was holding my cold hands in his warm ones. I loved this warmth. I don't know how I could love this, but I loved it. And the car moved. And blissful blackness again.

I stayed six days in the hospital. They told me I was lucky I survived. I had taken too much Heroin. My little brother and my best friend were coming every day to see me. The physicians talked to me about rehab. They told me if I was stopping all that, I could end in rehab. My little brother and our savior helped me to reduce my consumption. And I ended in a special hospital for drug addicts for six months. They told me I had committed suicide by drug abuse. And they helped me to talk about everything. When I got out, I was better. I didn't want to touch drugs again… And yet, even if he promised, my little brother was there, alone, waiting for me when I got out. He told me that our savior had to go out of London three months later, and he hadn't any news of him. I shouted. I was angry at him. He did promise to come at the end of all this. But he didn't come. In the end I forgot his face, his voice… And his name. And I took my destiny between my hands.


	2. Have a drink, it's not even the beginning. (L'imperatrice - L'imperatrice)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jump a little in time, and get His life displayed in front of you.

He looked around him. The crowd was shouting his name. Red carpet, it always got him like the first time. Except that he was more famous than before. And wasn't as shy as before. He hugged everyone he knew, Jessica and Elizabeth first, then Emma and Kat jumped in his arms. He saw some guys of the cast, like Robert or Chris H… Even Jeremy was here. It was some great quality time. High Rise had been promoted. It was fun to see how far he had gone. He had a small project before the big blockbuster he would made in a year. He was supposed to meet personally the director of that small project here, on the Red Carpet. She had told him she would be there. He knew her name because her movies had received many awards even if it was some unusual movie making. She didn't used famous actors, but Joanna Hogg had talked to her about him. And she had thought about having a couple of famous actors on her set for the first time in nine movies. So her tenth one may be a bigger one. Lots of people had wanted to donate to help her. Even him. He felt so strange about it. He laughed at a joke and looked back at the crowd, waving with the others. He had signed a couple of pictures, made a couple of selfies with fans… And a couple of pictures in front of journalists. Even after six whole years, he wasn't completely used to it. He made a little dance before getting inside the building where hundreds of famous people were. He sometimes felt a little out of place, but the feeling was leaving him quite quickly and he laughed with others. He moved towards the bar and ordered a glass of vodka tonic. Grey Goose. And at this moment someone hit gently his shoulder.

He turned and saw a woman in her thirties-forties. She had brown hair and hazel eyes, and seemed very calm. He smiled while remembering the description made of her. Red and black dress with a smiley badge. She asked him if he was Tommy H and he laughed. He answered positively and they began to talk. She told him a part of her crew should be here tonight. He offered his arm and she took it while talking. He found her very interesting and nice. They mostly talked about the movie, but other subjects came from here and there sometimes. He was wondering if he could try a little more with her, his glass in his hand, when she left him and kissed a delicious man in his forties. She introduced him as Jack, her boyfriend. Tommy laughed again and thanked them for that. They kept talking for a little while until a young boy came to them. And at this moment, memories began to come back as echoes. He knew he had already seen that boy. And sadness overwhelmed him. He didn't remember why he was sad. It didn't catch quick. He showed them a fake smile, trying to follow the discussion. They didn't move until the boy mentioned his sister who was outside. And the director was scared and ran outside, followed by the men and him. They saw Her. And he knew he met Her before, like the young man. And sadness went through him like a blade. He always had an emotional memory. The single problem with it was that it was always difficult to remember the whole story. He watched Her, and his brain screamed 'drugs'. She was under substances. He could recognize the symptoms with Her skin and bloodshot eyes… And movements. He stood there without saying a word while the others were silently praying she wouldn't do something stupid. They knew what she could do. They all knew Her. And they also knew that going to reach Her would scare Her. They stood there, watching Her dance and sing with the crowd while signing a couple of autographs and taking a couple of pictures… But the end came. The end of the fans crowd and the beginning of journalists, photographers… Interviewers. He knew how scary it was at first to end there. He knew how that felt. He simply didn't know how everyone could feel. And at some point, when She was about to reach them, She turned back and kept dancing with the fans. The young man began to move, stopped by the woman. He had tears in his eyes. Tommy could relate to him right now. He wanted to remember everything. But he couldn't now. His brain didn't allowed him that favor. And he stood there, motionless, expressionless when She climbed the barriers and jumped in the screaming crowd. Everyone was lifting Her, leading Her further away, security guards unable to do anything. They all looked at Her, disappearing.

When everything was finished, they looked at each other without a word. They all knew someway it was inevitable. She was too unpredictable. The director excused herself for what had happened. He brushed it off, telling her it wasn't her fault. And he left them there, getting back inside the building. While he walked away, he heard the young man's voice saying 'she promised' repeatedly. But, having a sister like her, he felt like he could at least know that you couldn't believe them, because they are drug addicts.

 

A few days had gone on until he met the director personally. He went there with his car. It was in Oxford. He saw her and acknowledged her with a smile. She excused herself once again and they walked together. She had sent him the script and he had read it. Of course, he loved it. She told him the first meeting's date and she smiled at him. They talked a little about their expectations on the project, he asked her some questions about her work. Then she lead him to her house and they drank while talking. In the end they decided to see the recording studios. They went back in London with their cars and parked next to the big building. They kept talking until they go in and the young man, the junkie's brother, ran into them. He wanted them to stay there until he tried to regularize the situation. But she wanted to show him the place, so she pushed Elwood away and moved inside the building. She didn't care about the mess. And Elwood whispered something in her ear that made her froze and sigh. She turned towards Him and, a little tense, she told him that they couldn't move in now. And she told Elwood they would come again in a few minutes. The young man ran inside, thanking her. She told him to wait. In the end, when they got in, neither of the young man nor the other person were here. She bring him inside some office and told him about the whole staff and people who'll work in that.

In the end, he came back home with her. She left him in front of his house before going away. He stepped inside, welcomed by the warm atmosphere of his girlfriend who had decided to surprise him. He was only half there. He sat on his sofa, Elizabeth coming next to him and kissing his neck, trying to cheer him up. She asked him about his day. He barely answered her. She told him that one of her friends invited them that night for dinner. He nodded half conscious, falling asleep little by little, not listening anymore. He was tired of all of those days. Barely 36 and already missing two months' holidays from school. Darkness and nice warmth wrapped him. He dreamed of some stupid things, like falling or being surrounded by white walls. But the last fall, he saw her. A young version coming from the depths of his young memories. And he woke up, sweating and afraid. He didn't remember why he woke up, but it seemed so bad… Elizabeth came and smiled, laughing at his disheveled appearance. He calmed down and sat on the sofa, realizing that he was under some blanket. She kissed him and he kissed her back, kinda used to this. They had decided that they would hook up together until one of them would find their “perfect half”. Now it ended like she loved him… And he didn't know what to do, because he didn't really knew how he felt but he knew it wasn't real love. Merely attraction. He just didn't want her to be pained. He kissed her once again and she climbed on his lap, warming him up, some erection growing without really wanting it when she stroked his nipples under his shirt and nipped his ears. He closed his eyes, pleasure growing again and again, his own hands beginning to undress her and give her some pleasure without touching any sensitive areas. In less than ten minutes, they were naked, on the couch, sweating and moaning, making out quite quickly and aggressively. She came first, him following a couple of minutes later, getting out and slipping out of the slick and heavy condom quite quickly too. She went in his bathroom after a quick kiss to prepare herself for the night. He wanted to be left alone for a couple of minutes. He looked at his couch, the tissue covered with cum and sweat, smelling the smell of rough and good sex. It was satisfying. Barely sentimental but satisfying. He stood up, still naked, taking his condom and putting it in the trash. Then he went in the bedroom to take some clothes, like a suit, and he got in the bathroom when she got out. He put his clothes on the sink, getting in the shower and taking one, using a vigorous power to wake him up. It took him fifteen minutes, then he dried himself and put his clothes on. He moved out from the bathroom, going to the kitchen to drink some coffee. She joined him and he helped her to get her dress ready. Then she got her purse and all she needed while he finished his cup of coffee. She made him hurry when the taxi came to get them where she wanted. She talked during the whole drive, telling him everything he needed to know about her friends and everything he could do. It was a huge party but they had some obligations to do. He half listened, thinking of his bed and how comfortable the house seemed to be when he was left alone.

They got out, and he realized that it wasn't a simple house, but a whole building they took for the reception. They were received by a guard who lead them into the building, where they found her friends. A married couple, friends of Elizabeth and hosts of the night, came to see them and welcomed them. The man presented himself as Garry and the young woman as Yslia. They talked to them and showed them everyone in the party. Tom saw the bar. And he laid his eyes on Yslia. Elisabeth and Garry were into a deep conversation with some friends of them. She was watching him with desire in her eyes. She was beautiful. Big blue eyes, blonde hair, quite pulp, her dress was white… She seemed like an angel. He laid his eyes away and excused himself, going to the bar to get some drinks. It was the first time in his life he was thinking about cheating one of his girlfriends and really wanting to go through this. He needed something strong. He ordered some vodka and drank it one way. It warmed him. He ordered another one, beginning to get relaxed. He was sitting on one of the chairs. He had drunk half of his second glass when he felt a hand on his left knee. He turned and saw Her. Yslia. She was smiling. And he could see in her eyes how deviant she was. Not an angel anymore then. She began to seduce him and he offered her a glass. They talked about Garry and Elizabeth… Then she began to ask him about his love and sexual life. In the end, he learned that he wasn't the first to have been seduced by her. And, after looking at the crowd to situate Elizabeth and Garry, she began to palm his new erection, which was quite big and remarkable in his pants. His breath quickened and she offered him to get somewhere private. His free hand was on the naked part of her back, stroking her, his fingers getting slowly under her dress, making her shiver in anticipation. He ended his fifth glass and nodded. They separated a little. Her face was a little red from the alcohol and excitement. A smirk began to form and she told him to follow her. He let her some time before moving, and, after checking the crowd, seeing Elizabeth laughing with Garry getting closer to her, he disappeared behind a door. She was here, light in the darkness. He crushed her lips and she answered with the same passion, grinding at the bulge in his trousers. He was about to lift her up when she stopped the kiss and took his hand, leading him in the stairs. She opened another door, ending in a penthouse. He raised his eyebrows and she explained they were living and they owned that building. He understood the marriage of interest she made, finding half horrific but quite nice for him. She lead him towards a huge bedroom, and she locked the door behind them, getting back into the kiss. They undressed each other, eager to discover their bodies, and he lifted her up, getting her on the bed and beginning some preliminaries. When she couldn't take it anymore, he took a condom, put it on his huge erection and sank in her with force. This time, he didn't care about love. She wanted a good fuck, he would give her a good fuck. It went like that for almost an hour and a half. She was sore, on her knees, cumming for the twelfth time. And he emptied himself on her. When he left her core, she fell on her side, shaking from the last orgasm, and he laid next to her, exhausted and relaxed. He put the silk sheets over them and turned off the lights, falling asleep a couple of seconds later, his protection still on him.

When he woke up, she was still sleeping. He had slept three hours. It was almost three in the morning. He took a shower, knowing that he would leave the girl in the bed and never see her again… And that he had to face Elizabeth's anger. He took off the condom, putting it in the trash, then dressed up and left the bedroom… To end nose to nose with a surprised and confused Elizabeth. He sighed, knowing that she would get it fast… And fast she did. She hit him and left the penthouse, the door slamming. He ran to get her in the stairs, telling her that he could explain, that he needed to get a couple of seconds for it. She told him to fuck off and ran in the reception, followed by him, and left it. Almost everyone was drunk. She shouted birds names at him and he called her name several times. When he almost reached her, she crossed the street. He ran to cross it, not watching out for cars.

Then it hurt once.

Twice.

It was dark.

Sounds were so far away.

Lights of the streets weren't able to be seen.

He wanted to sleep.

He only wanted to sleep.

His whole body was aching.

He felt heavy.

I want to sleep.

He began to feel better, away.

He heard a voice.

Far, so far away.

I want to sleep.

Something tried to shake him.

Leave me alone.

Something slapped him, and pain flew in his whole body.

“You're getting it buddy. Come back there !”

Let me sleep.

It hurt him so badly he whined. He spat blood.

His vision was blurry. He saw colored lights.

Some hand took his hand.

“If you can't speak but you can hold my hand, press my hand once.”

It was hard. So hard. He wanted to sleep. He hold it and pressed it once.

“Hell man, you're tough. Two cars. TWO fucking cars. You are alive. I hate dead people. You're cold ? One time for yes, two times for no. Three times for I don't feel anything.”

He pressed it once… And realized it was the truth. He did felt cold. He saw some silver thing and it covered him. He felt his torso again. And right arm. But nothing else.

Leave me alone.

“Okay, I want you to stay with me. Can you do that ?”

He pressed it one time… And another one. He didn't want to.

“Man, please, I beg you. Stay with me. My sis' is in my car, almost dying too. Can you stay awake while I bring her here, next to you ?”

Leave me…

Sis' ?

Sister ?

He had a sister ?

He pressed it once. He heard more than saw the boy's relief.

And he was left alone.

He closed his eyes for what seemed a long time for him.

He felt once again a hand.

“'Waky 'waky man !”

He pressed his hand, and opened slightly his eyes.

Blur. Lights.

And another voice.

He couldn't see where it came from.

He couldn't move his body.

“Woody...”

Female. A female voice. He didn't lie.

“Got too much today, uh ?”

“You did sis'. Stay with me sis', 'kay ?”

“Who's he?”

He tried to talk. His voice came hoarse, almost inaudible.

“… _Tom_.”

“Nice to meet you man ! I'm Elwood. She's Alix.”

“Dead ?”

“No sis'. He's fighting death. Try to do like him, please.”

“… Darkness seems so nice...”

“Like every time. But don't go there, okay. Stay with me. Both of you, stay with me...”

He frowned. Every time ? It wasn't her first time ?

He wanted to sleep, but wanted to know more.

That's when pain came like a wolf wanting to eat.

And he whined.

He didn't fully realized everything that happened. But he didn't feel more than half his body.

And pain was all over his body.

“Tom, breathe. You need to breathe.”

He didn't realized he was almost crushing the young man's hand… But he heard the high pitched sound of the ambulance.

And lots of voices.

And it was darkness again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello !   
> I'm so sorry for the delay, but I wanted to take some time to do that. And I may take more time to do a third chapter. I want to find the right words and not make it as childish as I used to. I'm French, so my vocab' may not be as good as most of yours. Anyway, THANK YOU for reading, and don't hesitate to leave me some comments about what I should and should not do...   
> KISSES GEEZS.   
> Army


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